The Top Photos of 2014, According to an Elderly Shut-In

By Agatha Richardson

Who are you again? Whatever you’re selling, I’m not interested. I don’t usually accept visitors, so you just stay outside while I keep the door cracked open.

What’s that? Oh my, has it been another year already? Time just flies on by. But what precious memories I have to share. One moment, let me go find my photo album. I think I left it under the pile of dead cats.

January 5th, 2014 – Fruit Cup Surprise! My old church was nice enough to drop off some goodies at my door! The box of apple creme fruit cups was truly a delight.
February 21, 2014 – Tea disaster! While I was walking from the kitchen into my parlor, a strong breeze blew my cup of Earl Grey right out of my hand! I should really talk to the landlord about getting more insulation in the walls.
April 9, 2014 – Mother Angelica Marathon! I’m gladdened to see that someone can provide some wholesome entertainment, not like that smut on CNN.
May 9, 2014 – Thief! I was looking through my cupboard, but found that my dish soap was completely gone. I hadn’t touched it in weeks, so someone else obviously must be sneaking in and using it, probably that Dominican woman who “volunteers” to clean my apartment each week. Nice try, sister!

You’re leaving? It’s a shame that you have go so soon. Won’t you stay just a bit longer?

June 18, 2014 – Furry Friends! I had some exciting visitors outside my window this summer, and boy did they like that yummy grass! They skedaddled before I could get more pictures, but I will never forget Rose, Thelma, and little Ronald.
August 20, 2014 – Caught up on some reading! I revisited my library and gave my noodle a little workout. Best of all, I came across some shortbread recipes that are to die for!

I know you have an appointment, but I simply can’t let you go without seeing this next one!

September 3, 2014 – Fred Astaire! I know this is an old picture, but I just can’t get my mind off that Fred. When I was a girl, I went down to the nickelodeon every week to see his pictures. It would be nice if he answered my letters one of these days. What a looker!
October 30, 2014 – Kitchen Disaster. This was a dark time in the Richardson household. I’m normally a very organized person, but I couldn’t find my coffee pot! I don’t know where in the heavens it could have gotten to, but I’ve been very sad without it. Next time my grandson visits, I can ask him to take a look.

Oh a work emergency!? And you work for the county, that must be fascinating. You must tell me all about it once we’re done with these photos.

November 28, 2014 – Exploring! Feeling particularly adventurous, I made a trip around the hallway of my floor. Must have been a twenty minute walk, and such nice decoration too! Here’s to taking more risks and living large in the new year!

Well thank you for dropping by! Please watch out for black ice on your way out, I do worry about all the people outside.


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