The New Yorker
I’m Sorry to Announce Layoffs at Ye Olde Colonial Village
Biography on A&E
McSweeney’s
Why No, I Haven’t Been Quarantining With My Secret Second Family
Variations of the “Marco Polo” Pool Game Based On Other Explorers
NWSL on Lifetime
Clause Out
Slackjaw
I’m Shrinking The Wage Gap By Making Way Less Money Than My Girlfriend
The National Lampoon/Weekly Humorist
A Timeline of the Development of the Modern Democracy
Vulture
Steve Miller Writes a Cover Letter
A Letter to My Future Daughter’s Best Friend
Points in Case
Forgive Me, I Ran a Charity 5K but Didn’t Cure Any Diseases
There’s Shareholder Value In Them There Hills
SOS! The Titanic Is Sinking and the Band Won’t Play Any Requests
Imaginary Blurbs on the Cover of My 4th Grade Book Report
How to Parallel Park While Barely Clinging to Your Masculinity
A Hip Dad’s Guide To Befriending His Server
Ransom Note From A Kidnapper Who Just Took A Creative Writing Class
Little Old Lady Comedy
I, Fyre Festival Founder Billy McFarland, Will Serve The Ultimate Prison Experience
The National Memo
Notes from the Trump-Pence Logo Design Meeting
Dan Fitzpatrick 